Biopsy positive for cancer, no surprise, no type yet as that will take a few days and really, after the brain tumor I’m not necessarily expecting a type to be found. the spot for biopsy was mid-back as that vertebra was quite dark on the MRI. The biopsy increased the pain a great deal and today Mum was on a morphine pump so less pain, more loopey, but loopey is okay and the pain lessens though being so drives her nuts. I keep telling her since she knows how loopy she sounds that is proof she’s not yet lost her mind. Radiation therapy starts Friday. that is expected to eradicate all the cancer in her spine. What residual pain is left based on the deterioration of the affected vertebrae is yet to be known. she cannot be discharged until the pain is low enough to be handled with oral pain killers that would make her a lump in a chair.

We are just taking it one step at a time. My mum will indicate when enough is enough, but for now she wants the treatment. When the cancer pops up again she may well make a different choice. It is her choice to make, but that whole does sadden me a great deal. It makes you feel like a little kid again, where the thought of being around without your mum is just too terrible to contemplate.

Thank you {{{{{{{{{{everyone}}}}}}}}}}} for your thoughts, energy, prayers, and candles. they mean a great deal to me. Sorry I have responded individually. I’ve made these two posts on LJ, one comment, and 2 posts in a forum in the past few weeks and that has been a stretch. FIREFLY – thank you for your advice, no VNA in PA, but we do have home health agencies here, mum does have a wee bit of long term care insurance. I will need to speak to the social services department of the hospital and maybe the Area Agency on Aging if I don’t like the answers from social services.

The cancer is back with my mum, in her spine per the MRI. Oncologist says very treatable and radiation will get rid of the pain (which is pretty horrendous from the expressions in my mum’s face), but since it cropped up once it will crop up again. He said she’ll still be here for the holidays, but not ten years from now. That’s a helluva spread, but I’m this much closer to this side of ten years and I’m guessing so is she.

Biopsy of the vertebrae on Tuesday with answers to what type of cancer in a few days after that. Asked for better pain management for her and so she has morphine. The confusion cleared up when her sodium went back up near normal. The pain made it hard to think, too, as does the morphine, but better from good drugs than bad pain.

Won’t be online much as you can imagine. I’ll try to check email daily, but between my mum and working more hours I’m a bit strapped. Plus figuring out after care when right now she cannot only walk a few steps and then only with full body support … fucked up all the way around. Her mind is clear enough to know exactly what is going on, too lucid for a nursing home which would kill her faster than the cancer so hopefully after radiation we can get her home care exactly how much she’ll need I have *no clue* or how expensive it is. LOOKS AT FIREFLY FOR HELP! But I told her we’d find a way for her to be at home if that is what she wants. She may be thinking she wants to be there so she can die there, but I haven’t the balls yet to ask that outright (still growing them I guess).

Found this out on Friday. Figured I should update my disappearance from the net. For all of those on my flist who may be suffering right now, too (didn’t read, so don’t know) I send you {{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}} for clarity, peace, and comfort.

The lung, abdomen, and pelvis CTs were clear any nodules! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! We’re still waiting for the estrogen receptor stain, results later today or Monday. But YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The longer it takes to show the less aggressive it is, so YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CTs repeated in 3 months and every 3 months for at least one year if they remain clear. The oncologist expects something to show up eventually, but for now YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

No more doctors until August as long as the estrogen receptor test is negative.

BTW, did I say YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!